


THIS BITCH EMPTY, YEET!

by DisenchantedHelena



Series: Amputee Peter Parker [1]
Category: Black Panther (2018), Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: And tolerates her oblivious gay best friend, Besides Tony, Everyone Freaks Out, Gen, He's just done, MJ loves her girlfrien, My hormonal, Peter has a prosthetic arm, Shuri yeets it, decided this would be funny to write, period-having ass, so here we go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 10:33:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14851110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DisenchantedHelena/pseuds/DisenchantedHelena
Summary: "This bitch empty, yeet!" Was heard commonly since MJ and Shuri nabbed Peter. Once they threw the shield, once Bucky's arm.Nobody expected that, after hearing it, over half of Spider-Man's ARM would land on the table they were sitting at.They react like any sane being would. Screaming.-This is not how Peter wanted to tell them about the prosthetic. In fact, this was probably the last option on his non-existent list of ways to show them.Now everyone is screaming. Well, Tony is just sitting there with an "oh shit" face, so he doesn't count. But he already knew.





	1. Chapter 1

Peter had been taken by the 'meme-hoes'. As MJ and Shuri called themselves. T'Challa just deeply inhaled whenever they shouted the name, as if he didn't even have enough energy to say anything about it. Tony only took him from the two girls constant vine and emo band references when Peter came up in Avengers related conversation. No shame in letting him hang out with his friends. 

And okay, maybe their references weren't the worst. Confusing? Yes. Out of nowhere? Definitely. But mostly they pulled harmless pranks or messed around with inventions. Nobody knew how the fuck Peter had already made his webshooters a thousand times better in the three days they'd been there. In fact, they'd done a lot of tech-stuff since the Avengers arrived. MJ usually just sat back and watched to make sure nothing exploded. And also somehow allied herself with Natasha. Which was threatening. 

One time Peter passed Steve his shield by yelling, "This bitch empty, YEET," which both confused everyone and also was somehow hilarious to watch. Mostly due to Steve's face. Shuri did it with Bucky's arm too. ( _GIVE ME BACK MY ARM, YOU LITTLE SHITS_ ) And everyone figured that those were the only things that reference could apply to. They were, however, extremely wrong. 

Because as they were discussing the upcoming superhero shit, Tony wasn't paying too much attention to some of it, they heard the phrase, followed almost immediately by "Guys, I need that!" from Peter. They were all expecting some sort of mechanical object, perhaps a webshooter. Not _most of his fucking arm._

And then, besides Tony, who was sitting with an 'oh shit' face, they did what any rational person would do when your teammates dismembered arm was sitting on the table, somehow not bloody. 

They screamed.


	2. It's Fake Please Calm Down-

Peter took a deep breath, glancing at where his prosthetic once was. "Not how I wanted this to go, but I really need that back," he sighed. He made his way to the main area, where they were sitting, and saw his gloved arm on the table. Everyone around it was freaking out, despite the obvious lack of blood. He walked forwards and grabbed it, muttering about how much of a pain in the ass it'd be to reattach. 

"Why the _fuck_ are you so calm?" Clint asked, and Peter realized that to them it look like Shuri had somehow cut his arm off with no blood. Because lets be honest, she could probably do that. He shared a quick glance with Tony, who gave him a small nod. Peter just removed the glove showing the fake limb. 

"It's metal," he replied, watching everyone slowly calm down. Natasha examined the prosthetic as Peter adjusted it slightly and put it back on his arm. "And this is not the way I wanted to tell you..it was going to avoid a shitty pun but not the point, but uh..it is the way I told you, just now." 

Steve slowly exhaled. "Okay, okay," he muttered. "So you're not...going to die? Or something?" He asked hurriedly. Peter shook his head. Steve relaxed, letting out a sigh of relief. As ridiculous as it'd seemed, he knew that Wakandan technology was more advanced. Somehow ' _yeeting_ ' an arm away from the rest of the body seemed possible. Compared to what he was used to, Wakanda was like something out of the future. Well, further into the future than he'd gone. Bucky was observing the sleek metal appendage with a reserved look. Peter eyed the much calmer Avengers, casting a small glare at MJ and Shuri - holding back laughs. Occasional snickers escaping Michelle at the reaction they'd all had. Shuri muttered something and she turned redder, a hand over her lips as she said something to her girlfriend. Peter reminded himself to plan his revenge later. For now, he just stood there was an awkward look on his face, surrounded by mildly relieved, very freaked out Avengers and T'Challa. (Peter wasn't sure if he was part of them yet.) Fuck his life. 


End file.
